When I roused, my wrists were in handcuffs and my handcuffs were linked to Doofus by another set. I was in the back seat of one of the Escalades. Why couldn’t they at least hook me up with Pretty Boy? When my luck runs out, it goes all the way down the drain. I tried to rub the side of my head and pulled Doofus along with me. He yanked back, so I turned to the window reflection to check on my wound. Couldn’t tell a damned thing, but it hurt like a son-of-a-sailor, as Buffet would say.

M...