Chapter 1 – The trip down.
It started out just like any other day where we were going away to visit family.
I opened my eyes and felt the day light on my face, light beams streaming through the crack in the curtains warmed my cheek as I lay still in bed. Familiar sounds thrummed their way to my ears, mum in the kitchen, radio on chatting away, pots being moved about, breakfast was being prepared as usual. The clatter of Simon’s claws on the tile floor as he kept repositioning himself for the best angle in case of any scraps of food that might fall his way. Dad’s deep voice carried through the house and his occasional laugh vibrated like bass, as he kept Mum company as she busied around the kitchen.
I decided I had better get up before mum came in and ripped open the curtains and tutted at me for being lazy.
Today was a busy day, we were all off to visit Uncle George and Aunt Sue. There was a long drive ahead.
I pulled myself up on one elbow and stretched my arms, pushed myself up and let my legs drop off the side of the bed, into my slippers that were there waiting for me. I chose my brown cords to wear and a yellow T-shirt, dragged a brush through my hair – that’ll do I thought to myself.
It was 1984, I was 12 nearly 13 – just 12 days to my birthday, not that I was counting. I would be a teenager! And practically a grown up. This made me smile to myself as I made my way down the stairs towards the noisy kitchen.
“I was just going to come and get you,’ Mum said as I sat myself at the table, ‘We have to get on the road soon, or we will hit traffic and Dad will moan’
“I won’t moan’ Dad said, ‘There is no rush, is there?’
Mum put a bowl of cornflakes in front of me and poured the milk on. I grabbed a spoon and dug it in the sugar. ‘Don’t go mad with that,’ Mum said ‘you’ll end up with worms. I wrinkled my nose at this comment but got a big spoonful anyway and plopped it on the orange flakes in the bowl. Simon rested his head on my knee, and I ruffled his head and ears. I started scooping up the flakes, milk dripping from the spoon.
Dad clapped his hands on his knees, “Right’ he said, better get the stuff in the van I suppose, it won’t do itself,’ and he raised his large frame up from the table and beamed his smile at me. ‘Come on Simon, stop begging you can keep me company’. The spaniel dutifully followed Dad outside.
‘Have you packed your bag?’ Mum asked me as I continued to munch on my breakfast. I locked eyes with my mother, and she rolled her eyes ‘well, get eating and go and get it sorted, we have to go soon.’
I quickly finished up eating and took a slurp of juice “thanks, Mum’ I said and got up from the table. ‘go on get ready’ Mum said and smiled at her.
I ran back up the stairs to my room and dragged my bag from the wardrobe and began throwing clothes into it. I grabbed my Walkman and some tapes of music, a colouring book and pens and my journal. I chose a couple of books off her shelf and figured that would be enough to stave off the inevitable boredom ahead on the journey and whilst visiting family. We travelled to see Uncle George and Aunt Sue a couple of times a year, my nan lived near them, and we usually visited her at the same time. As I had gotten older, I found I got bored with the visits, my cousins had been older than me and weren’t always there anymore so it would be just me and the adults so visiting wasn’t the same as before. I made sure to take things with me to keep me occupied. My uncles house just didn’t feel the same without my cousins there.
I made my way back downstairs where Mum was sorting out bags ready to go in the van, she looked up at me. “Want me to plait your hair?’ she asked. I shrugged ‘ok’ it would keep the hair out of my face, just how I liked it and I liked Mum doing my hair. I could never get it to do the same as she could, so I usually just left it down. Mum sat me down at the kitchen table and brushed my hair then divided it in to two sections and started plaiting. She was fast, and I was soon up and outside, my long blond hair now in two neat plaits down my back.
Dad was loading bags into our bright blue Volkswagen camper van. We always seemed to take so much stuff, just in case, my dad would say. ‘You never know, you wouldn’t like it if we broke down and had nothing to eat or keep warm with’ I suppose I wouldn’t, but the camper always felt safe and comfortable. We had stayed in it many times over the years, and I had gotten used to it being stuffed full of food and goodies.
I climbed into the back of the van and took my seat next to the window, Simon jumped up next to me and lay down with his head on my lap. I ruffled his ears. I got my Walkman out of my bag and grabbed a tape with the most recent charts recorded on to it. I would spend most Sunday afternoons recording the charts from Radio 1 so I could listen to them over and over. I pressed play and listened to Wham’s ‘wake me up before you go go’ One of my favourites and number one at the time so I knew I would have to turn the tape over after it finished.
Dad had done with loading the van and then Mum came out locking the door behind her, she leaned into the side door and offered me a tin of butterscotch sweets ‘to stop you feeling car sick’ she said I took them and said thanks. I always enjoyed the travel sweets; they were only ever eaten in the van on journeys. Mum slid the door shut on the van and then got into her seat in the front. Dad wiggled the gear stick from side to side and started the engine.
We trundled down the familiar roads and I gazed out of the window, we drove past my friends Sarah’s house, and I looked in to see if I could see her. I couldn’t but knew I would be back in a few days, and we would be able to hang out and have fun like we always did. The buildings gave way to fields, and I knew we were not far from the motorway, I turned the tape over on my Walkman. Duran Duran started singing to me and I settled in for the long journey ahead of us.
Dad never drove fast, not that ‘fast’ was ever a setting on a VW Camper. I always thought to myself that when I could drive, I would drive fast but dad was always in the slow lane anyway. I watched the fields zip past and noted if the cows were standing or sitting in their fields.
I woke up with a start, my neck hurt from being bent in a funny position while I slept. Simon was sat up panting in my face and I pushed him away and sat up straight, the motorway had given way to countryside lanes, and I recognised them as being close to my uncles. The roads were thick with trees on both sides which made it so dark it was almost like driving at night except for the beams of light that pierced through, the woods smelled damp and foreboding, the roads were twisting, and hills were steep then we would break free from the trees and be running downhill with rolling countryside on the right side, whilst the trees remained on the left. At the bottom of the hill was a village with a few houses and one shop and I knew we were nearly there. We rounded the next corner out of that village, and I could see my uncle’s house. Set back from the main road and adjoining one other it was a big double fronted building with a back and a side extension. My mum always said her brother was never satisfied with what he had and was constantly doing DIY in his home - I hadn’t been since the new extension had been completed. The house had large front and back gardens and a long driveway that was accessed through the back.
Dad slowed down and turned into the pathway that ran alongside the house then turned right into their driveway and pulled up at the garage. Once the van had stopped, I leant forward and pulled the side door handle and drew the sliding door back, Simon leapt out and began investigating, nose down tail wagging. I got out and stretched my arms and yawned. I looked at my uncle’s house and it looked different with the new side extension, I figured I might get lost inside it and wondered why they needed so much space since they were alone in there now my cousins had pretty much all left. My cousins, their children, were two girls and one boy, the oldest girl now lived with her boyfriend. Mum said they didn’t know where so we couldn’t visit which I felt sad about. The boy had joined the army and was away from home most of the time and the youngest, closest in age to me had gotten a job and stayed out of the house often. When we were younger, Anna and I would play together and despite the 5-year gap I felt close to her, especially as we saw each other at least twice a year for these visits. They would come to us, and we would come here to their house. I didn’t know what I was going to do with myself without her but imagined I would at least be able to hang out in her cool bedroom and listen to her music and maybe pretend she was there.
Mum had got out of the van and was stood next to me, usually the kids would be running out to greet us but of course that wasn’t going to happen this time. The house just stood there looking at me, it felt cold and uninviting. No sign of my uncle or aunt – I could tell my mum was surprised too, that they were not there to greet us as usual. They knew we were coming, right?
Dad busied himself with the bags, deciding what we were going to take inside and me and mum made our way up the path towards the house. Mum knocked on the door – another weird thing – we had never had to knock before as they were always waiting for us in the garden. Silence from the huge house. Mum knocked again and finally we heard movement in the kitchen and then the porch door opened, and my aunt was there and opened the door to us.
‘Hi’ she said ‘I didn’t hear the door, I was upstairs’
“that’s ok’, Mum said
‘Good trip?’ my aunt enquired
‘Oh, you know, the usual’ Mum said and smiled.
“Well, come in’, she said and went back into the kitchen.
I stepped inside and immediately didn’t recognise the home, there was a newly fitted kitchen that looked like it had never even been used. There were so many cupboards that I couldn’t imagine anyone having enough stuff to put inside them all. They even had a breakfast bar with stools which was very cool. I hoisted myself up on to one of the stools and dangled my legs, swinging them and letting my ankles hit the stool legs.
Dad entered with bags in hand and Simon followed him in.
‘He’s not muddy, is he?’ my aunt asked.
‘No, Sue I’m not muddy at all, just been in the van’ Dad said and smiled
She of course meant Simon, though it had never been a problem before.
‘The place looks lovely.’ Dad said ‘must’ve taken a while to get done’
‘Yes, it has, George has done it all himself’ she said as she wiped the kitchen side that didn’t need wiping.
‘It’s great, Sue’ Mum said finally ‘you must be so happy with it’
Aunt Sue smiled and then said ‘tea?’ as she filled the kettle.
I was only 12 and didn’t really understand adult stuff but something was wrong, my uncle George hadn’t come out to greet us even yet and the whole feeling was one of not really being welcome. Being 12 I chose to ignore the adults and busied myself with my Walkman, choosing another tape to listen to - I found my ‘Complete Madness’ album which seemed appropriate – first track Embarrassment. I was happy with that.
My uncle George emerged from the living room just after Sue passed out the cups of tea, I wondered how long he had been in there. He greeted everyone in his usual jovial way, hug for my mum, handshake for my Dad, head ruffle for Simon. Then he turned to me. ‘Well, haven’t you grown?’ he said I suppose I had, I thought. So, I beamed my smile at him, my initial shyness over whelming me suddenly, it happened when I was in new situations. I pulled my headphones off my head and let them drop around my neck. But that was the end of our exchange apparently, so I listened to them chatting, the atmosphere had lifted a little since George had come in and he and Dad were chatting, and Mum and Aunt Sue were talking about other relatives and what they were doing. The truth was we hadn’t seen them for quite a while. Visits had been regular twice a year for as long as I could remember but the last couple of years, we hadn’t seen them, Mum had said because of all the work that they were having done on the house. Now I was here I could see why, and it seemed to make sense.
House of Fun had started playing on my Walkman.
“Welcome to the house of fun, now you’ve come of age’
‘Welcome to the lion’s den, temptation on its way’ Suggs sang into my ears, looking back, there was a foreshadowing to this that at the time passed me by entirely.