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from Don't Let Go by Karla Martinez

Copyright © 2019 Karla Martinez

Facing the Past

School was a torture the whole day. The gossip about Yael's fight with Cameron ended up giving Cameron a three-day suspension. Though I didn't mention a word, I did want to know the details, but I didn't want to keep bothering Yael when I knew who was responsible for the mess and he needed time to heal his wounds and his heart.

Finally, the last class ended for the day, I walked out. Knowing that Yael wouldn't want to talk about him, I had to think for myself of a place where he could be. I needed my time alone, and Rocky wasn't a good company anymore. April was moving fast, May was going to come up soon and that meant the Elite group of players was going to graduate soon. The wind fanned my hair, the fresh cut grass smelled pleasant.

Walking home by myself was the best therapy for my beat-up conscience. The nights were not cold anymore and the sun sat late, so I walked through the park freely. I needed time to breathe fresh air. I needed to be alone and think about how was I going to come clean? tell Aubrey, tell Cameron, tell all my friends that I was destined to die, like every human in the world. Except my death was just going to be sooner. Going through the park always brought me back to my first date with him, and to the time he sadly looked at the river. Then it hit me. The river!

My heart dropped, I stopped as soon as my eyes spotted the silver motorcycle parked next to a bench, Cameron's bike. Without thinking, my feet walked towards it, but Cameron wasn't there. I was afraid to see him. I loved, Cameron. I had to be honest with him. Yael did it. And now it was my turn. Can I do it?

The sun was just starting to set, there was a sad feeling to it. Raising my eyes to the reddish sky, I couldn't help but wonder, how was I going to stop enjoying this. Looking at something so beautiful, my heart clenched as a knot formed in my throat. I took in a deep breath. I looked up to the sky and pray silently to God to let me live. I didn't want to die. Not yet. Every time I thought about it hurt me, it shuddered my soul to know I could disappear just like that.

"What are you doing here?" his voice evidently annoyed to see me there, or maybe just frustrated with everything. I jumped to my feet, wiping the tear appearing in the corner of my eye.

"We need to talk..." my voice sounded relieved to know that he was fine, at least that was good. Though there were darker bruises on his face, his hair was wildly messy. How was it, that even with the mess approaching I still found myself drooling for Cameron. His intense eyes gazing at me, emotionlessly. Heavily sighing just like I had done, he walked closer. My heart jumped, helplessly at his closeness.

"Cameron..." I tried to get my feelings out, but...

"You knew... all this time, you knew..." a slight trembled in his voice, his eyes full of regret and guilt. I couldn't say anything; my voice was locked inside. Cameron loved Yael, it's just that it wasn't the same type of love. And that...

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