For once I found myself enjoying my time with Amy and Ivonne. They weren't as vain as I thought they were. Actually, Ivonne was very shy when it came to romance. She was in love with Angel. Genuinely in love and that was a surprise. Amy was more like a party rocker, the perfect friend for my sister. They were fun to be with when Aubrey wasn't around. Although that was rarely the case.
Yael as expected, he was up for having and giving me a good time. We spent a full day walking next to the water, singing out loud, dancing our feelings away. In a way, I was happy that he was the way he was. Loving the same person, we could understand each other in a way, the rest didn't get. We talked to each other leaving the rest of the world out. He was the angel I needed to guide me through my rough days. He was turning into someone more important to me than anyone, ever. I treasured Yael, and the thought of dying and never seeing him again made me sad. Really sad.
Although I had my fun, I also needed my rest. While everyone was out, I stayed behind and worked on my Spring homework and took my much-needed break. For a moment I dislike Mr. Gailes, for giving us this stupid homework, just when I had decided to stay away from him. To settle myself away from him, he came up with a brilliant plan to get us together again. But of course, this was the complicated relationship God and I had. I was used to it already and I expected no better.
The nights at the beach were windy and cold. Keeping my window open to hear the sound of the waves crashing against rocks felt magical. Remembering how cynically Aubrey asked Cameron to go with her, and him, not wasting time accepting. Typical of him, it annoyed me sometimes how difficult was to understand him, but I was the one who pushed him away.
Cameron kept his distance, which helped me calm my heart. Although it was what I wanted, it hurt me to see him with my sister. I sighed giving up of my depressing love life. Trying to stay calm, I stretched my arms to feel the cool breeze of night. Listening to Yael's playlist, I focused on my homework.
"Such a romantic." I couldn't help to smile at Yael's soothing taste of music.
Letting myself go with the rhythm of Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson, I closed my eyes and let the song move me to the point of tears. My heart jerked furiously to feel his arms slowly sliding down my shoulder, slowly reaching Yael's iPod. He paused the song. I froze.
The surprise wasn't good for my heart and for my mind. Immediately I wiped my tears, hoping that he wouldn't, the embarrassment made me jump out of the chair, pushing him away in shock. He stood there gazing at me, my hands frozen on his chest. I could feel the blood rushing to my face, good thing my hair was all over the place, he wouldn't notice.
"What the hell..." I stumbled over the words, trying to ignore the disturbance in my chest. He placed his hands over mine. There was something different in his eyes. His hair was wild, his skin had finally turned slightly darker with the sun. His shirt half buttoned.
"What are you doing here?" I demanded my voice still couldn't cover the embarrassment and shock.
"Samantha." the way he said my name, urged me to meet his eyes. Those eyes that would never look at me the way he was doing now. No, Cameron! I wasn't strong enough to push him away once more. Not when he kept looking for me, even if he didn't like me like I did. He was persistent and I was weak.
"I wanted to talk to you about something," he said casually.
It was annoying to keep going back and forth between reasons and logic when it came to Cameron Derwood. We were doing good keeping our distance, I was surviving. I had hope that I would make it through this trip without dying. But, once again God had other plans for me.
I wasn't ready to surrender to my love for Cameron. I was too much of a coward to face his rejection and keep going like the rest did.
"Talk to me... About what?" I asked trying to sound as casual as him.
Struggling to pull my hand away from him, I knew the excitement wasn't good for my heart. And lately, I could taste the danger of not being as strict as Doctor Jackson had ordered. I was throwing away all their effort and I felt guilty about it, but I couldn't. I love Cameron. I love him with my broken heart. I love his eyes, his hair, his scent. I love you.
"It's kind of annoying..." he said, giving me goosebumps, he suddenly lent down to rest his forehead on mine.