I was afraid of knowing, of finding out the reason of a torturous pain. And this time God finally decided to agree with me. To let me know, but I would have chosen to a better way than this. I took a deep breath and held onto Yael. He smiled with compassion and tried his best not to hurt my already fragile skin.
"Thanks," I whispered to him, I was getting used to his calming scent, Yael was so different from Cameron, Angel and way more different than Miles. He was a gentleman hiding behind a rough image, in a way he was just like Cameron. That's probably why there were best friends.
I had planned to knock before entering Dr. Jackson's office, but we all stopped as the hysteric dispute. My mom, she never cried before, or a least I never saw her, not until this very moment. My damaged heart started trembling at the sound of her voice. My soul had already left my body. Shivering, I gripped onto Yael's hand. He pulled me closer to his body to keep me warm, it kind of hurt to feel his arm around my waist, but there was no other way to keep me on my feet.
"Susan, please calm down." Dad tried to calm my mom, but he was failing to keep his voice steady himself. I managed to get closer to the door, something in my gut stopped me from interrupting their discussion.
"That's my girl, that's my baby!" Mom argued with evident agony.
"We talked about this before. I warned you. This is what we were trying to avoid." Dr. Jackson sounded stressed, maybe annoyed.
"Samantha can't be having a normal school life, she's not like the rest of the kids her age. Believe me, I know how difficult this is for her, but-" Dr. Jackson stopped talking.
I knew his voice clearly. I've always been doing checkups with him. Taking a quick glance at the tag beside his door. Dr. Robert Jackson, Cardiologist. My heart squeezed painfully as the words registered in my brain. My heart, something was going on with my heart.
"But you said, she will live at least her twenties!" Mom cried desperately. She was shaking, I knew it, or maybe it was me. Gripping on Yael's chest, my heart was racing, which it was the reason I was in the hospital in the first place. Calm down. I told myself, but the lump in my throat was hurting my already scraped cords.
"Sam," Yael whispered in my ear, his voice evidently worried, he was just as shocked as I was. I shook my head, letting him know I wasn't moving from there. I was frozen, my body was cold like a block of ice. I had been awakened to a reality too obvious not to see. My eyes fell on my bruised wrist from all the needles Barbara had buried in them. I was pale, my skin looked fragile, almost like it could rip with a touch. I was sick, so sick I couldn't make it past my twenties?
"I'm fine." I managed to get the words out of my swollen throat, my eyes were dry but they burn as the tears started balling.